Once Upon a Time...
there was a girl who dared to be brave.
Her heart was built with a protective shield of elegant, gleaming gold. It helped her heart always stay safe. Any emotion she was not ready to Look at would be put in the locket and forgotten in her conscious state.
I suppose in some way, it was always going to be a story, of a girl...who lost herself to find a dream she didn’t know she would need.
A few months go by and she’s found herself a new desire. One that felt brave but only brought her body shame. The loss was not one that came and left quickly be, it waited till she weakened then
ripped the only part of her beneath the surface swiftly.
She had lost herself and the bravery was gone. Her confidence was no longer something she was able to hold tight. She dragged herself swiftly down the stairs, to school, and back home. Once a girl with friends around, now stood alone. She tried to cry but that didn’t feel right. It was clear as the day her body was drifting from sight.
Quickly, feelings kept fading. It was the numbness that kept her from going crazy. This girl who loved to be adventurous laid alone each night eating sliced up grapes, as her portions shrunk each day.
Years went by, you know how time flies when you play pretend. The girl was now a young woman but didn’t know it then. She soaked up admiration the times she was quite thin, but since the day we last spoke of her, she’s not always been the same. You see now listen, She starved herself for far too long and One day her body reacted and it decided it was time to move on. And soon enough she gained it all back and self-esteem was lost. It looked as if her whole existence was drifting off.
Into the space so vast so deep, its boundless place holds all the things we wish we could leave behind. Although she might not see it as such, her mind began to see the damage of what she had done.
This happened twice again, to this day and so forth. Yet deep down inside her heart, the elegance was fading, and the gleaming gold that protected her all this time finally died and drifted to the boundless places.
With an open heart and a broken system, she began to ask herself, honestly was it worth it? Was this really what she dreamed to be? As a little girl with such bravery, how could she have become someone so cowardly?
So a few years down the road, her soul revealed what it needed from her. She then asked herself once more...
Was this love she felt? Would she finally go back to the person she was? What the woman did not know was she was destined for much more. Her ability to grow was soon to be a refreshing reward.
So on an ordinary day, she walked down the college hallways, standing taller than the day before.
A few more years would pass her, some heartache passed her too. Her emotions deeply longed for her to give in to all she ever knew.
This day the woman said no, and chose to believe in herself by letting an old friend go.
That warm windy afternoon she stood outside. looking around at the World. She imagined how often we let it pass us by. She thought and looked at the beautiful trees she often sees. She admired their will to go but always keep their roots in place. They have to be reborn to fully become apart of the planet's embrace.
Their sacrifice is greater than what we can imagine, and the woman cry...
I want them to know I am grateful each spring you never fail to bring fresh air and the magic of bright newborn green.
So from that moment that moment on the tree and the woman agreed that come the time of crisp air, she would wait until the first leaf falls. Then she knew she could not waste any more time, for both of them were ready to let go. I watched the thin layer of the eating disorders last shredded skin, be lift away. The tree then knew it was okay to say goodbye for there is beauty is patiently waiting for the next time.
The trees' leaves fell and so did her desire to fix her imperfections.
It wasn’t at that moment that she loved herself again. This was not a fairytale with an unrealistic end. Instead, every day she battled for a better tomorrow filled with new beginnings and spring-colored flowers.
A lot of her younger days were spent under the hallowed ground. She now knew she spent a lot of time questioning her mind. This is why when she did decide that she was ready to shine, the world would no longer be blamed, and society would begin to feel Shame
To this day nobody knows what put her in overdrive.
Was the thing that knocked her down, the thing that helped her fly?
Soon after, the woman spent some time, recreating the gold glimmering chain. Just like she had as a little girl it enchanted the eyes, with both gleaming gold and dazzling shines. but instead of putting it on her heart, she left it on the nightstand each time she went to bed.
For she no longer needed protection from herself, but it kept her from ever choosing to go back down a painful path.
She embraced her emotions, the good and bad. She loved the moments she’d dance in her car, and when she kissed a man and felt butterflies in her heart.
Once more, the woman walked down a hallway.
This one is cleared of old emotions. The hall that she again walked alone, sparked a creative design for her entire life. She smiles and could imagine the beautiful fireworks celebrating the value of working through the madness. She smiled from ear to ear with a rosy complexion, and screamed “world be ready to challenge my beautiful imperfections.”
Without questions or hesitation, she begins to work from home. she built and built as best she could before releasing it to the world. Her confidence was strong enough for her fears to be ignored.
There was no failing, as she told me recently. She said, “Beyond Body Images was born from my existence.” She continued without a moment for breathe. “Although I might be the reason, I am just the first block, of a solid foundation built from a community we must fill with love.”
Her wish to me was to be the dream that her future self could see. She told me this because that little girl was always me.
So yes I am a woman with just one message. I am just a story and some words built from this world. One that has let us down too many times, not nature but the people that occupy all our time. They chose to tell us a long time ago, what we should dress and look like, and our bodies had no way to fight for themselves.
So I wish this New Year’s Eve, if not for you then for me, will you ask the person underneath the physical worth you see, why it matters so much to have a perfect body? If you don’t find yourself feeling that extreme what is something you could do, to celebrate the mind within your Body?
If we all take our time in 2021. A time of resolutions that simply must not be undone. Something that would be too contagious to want to stop, because we find ourselves too busy loving who we are.
And I’d be proud to go outside this spring and know the trees can be welcomed by positivity.
Beyond body images is here to wish you a happy new year. May the greatest adventures be near. Let’s always remember to take care of us this year and then take care of each other’s. Please subscribe if you haven’t already and share to any social media with the buttons below!
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SEO and Founder of Beyond Body Images